EGO Problems - Pride and Fear

Edging God Out as the One we worship, as our source of self-worth and security, and
as our source of self-worth and security, and as our primary audience results in two
kinds of EGO problems: pride and fear. When false pride and toxic fear enter into a
relationship, they poison it. When they become the driving force in our leadership
decisions, they render them ineffective.

Self-serving leaders react to things that happen to them. If you say something to them
or do something that hooks their pride or fear, they react. They spend little time
considering what is in the best interests of others or their relationships. They shoot
from the hip and sometimes end up shooting themselves in the foot. Pride or fear-filled
people are quick to judge, quick to take offense, quick to speak, and quick to push
blame away and pull praise closer.

Servant leaders, on the other hand, respond to things that happen to them. Before
taking action, they are able to step back, even for a second or two, from the emotion
of the moment and apply some value checks to the situation out of a desire to serve
the common good. They are quick to listen, slow to judge, slow to anger, and quick
to turn the praise light onto someone else.


* Pride

Pride centers on the promotion of self. It is, as we read in Romans 12:3, thinking
of yourself "more highly than you ought."

The Bible has much to say on the subject of pride. Proverbs 13:10 tells us,
"Pride only breeds quarrels." Proverbs 16:18 says, "Pride goes before destruction
and a haughty spirit before a fall." And Proverbs 16:5 declares, "The LORD detests
all the proud of heart. Be sure they will not go unpunished."

Some people reading these words will say, "But that's not me. I don't have any
false pride. I know that everything comes from God and is on loan to me."
That's great. But often there is a more subtle way in which we Edge God Out - fear!


* Fear

The other dynamic of Edging God Out is fear. Most people don't normally recognize
fear as an EGO issue, but it is at the root of may seemingly prideful behaviors.
The capacity to fear is a gift from God. When applied as intended, fear can keep
us focused on doing the right thing for the right reasons. Yet what we actually
do with the gift of our capacity to fear often prevents us from enjoying its
benefits. Instead of enhancing life as a dimension of keeping our focus on God,
fear has poisoned human relationships ever since man first stepped out of God's
will. The first thing Adam and Eve did after they ate the forbidden fruit was
become self-conscious, cover up, and hide in fear. In a way we have been hiding
ever since, in fear that our weaknesses and bad behavior will be found out. The
irony is that God - the only one who matters on an eternal scale - already sees
and knows it all.

In Psalm 111:10, we read, "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom"; and
in Proverbs 14:26, we read, "He who fears the LORD has a secure fortress, and for
his children it will be a refuge." God as the preeminent object of wholesome fear
is made clear at the end of Ecclesiastes by King Solomon, who gives the definitive
statement of the positive purpose and application of our capacity to fear: "Now
all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his
commandments, for this is the whole duty of man" (12:13).

In stark contrast to the wholesome awe of God, Proverbs 29:25 tells us, "Fear
of man will prove to be a snare." Jesus poses the core question regarding the
right use of the gift of fear when He tells His followers: "I tell you my
friends, do not be afraid of those who can kill the body and after than can do
no more. But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear him who, after the
killing of the body, has the power to throw you into hell. Yes I tell you,
fear him" (Luke 12:4-5).


~ Lead Like JESUS, Lessons from the Greatest Leadership Role Model of ALL TIME
Ken Blanchard and Phil Hodges